My top pick for tips on how to catch cheating is this book by Sarah Paul

Archive for July, 2008

Can You Recognize the Signs of a Cheating Girlfriend?

Wednesday, July 30th, 2008

While statistics on infidelity tell us that men are the main culprits for cheating, the fact is that women are just as guilty of cheating as men. Women seems to be more devious in being able to keep their affairs secret, so much so that their best friends don’t even know about it. Although it is harder to spot the signs of a cheating girlfriend they are there. You just have to learn what they are so you can recognize them.

It is true that all women like to wear sexy lingerie to make them feel attractive and to turn on their partner. When you notice that your girlfriend still wears her sexy lingerie but doesn’t want to show it to you or displays little interest in lovemaking with you, then you should go with your feeling that she may be cheating. You should bring up the subject, just to see what she says because it is possible there may be a reasonable explanation, such as being tired or not feeling well.

A “sudden” interest in dressing up, a change in hairstyle or hair color, or a change in perfume could also be a sign of cheating. This is not to say that every time your girlfriend buys a new outfit or changes her hairstyle, she is cheating. The operative word here is “Sudden” in that she seems obsessed in making sure that she looks and smells nice every time she leaves the house. This is especially true if the changes make her seem more provocative and you hadn’t given any hints or suggestions that it would be something you would like her to do.

Intimacy and emotional attachment are two things that women equate as being synonymous. If you walked hand in hand or hugged and kissed a lot and now she doesn’t seem to want to do this, it could be a sign that she is losing interest in you and has someone else in her life.

Depending on the nature of her job, she may have to work overtime on occasion or travel. If this activity has suddenly increased and she is working lots of extra hours, you should be inquisitive to find out how much extra money she is earning. If there is no noticeable difference in her pay, then it is very likely that the overtime hours are not being spent in the workplace. A drastic increase in travel, especially to the same locations, could also tell you that she is taking trips with someone else or that she met someone on one of her business trips and keeps going back to see him.

There is no one sign that can attribute to your girlfriend cheating on you. One or two of these signs can arouse your suspicions so that you start noticing little things that didn’t appear significant in the past. One of these is to notice how she acts when talking on the cell phone. When she openly talks on the phone in front of you at certain times, but moves to another room when she receives some of the calls, this caller could be another man that she doesn’t want you to know about.

Why Women Cheat - Some of the Common Reasons

Wednesday, July 23rd, 2008

Why women cheat has been the topic of many surveys and papers trying to determine the reasons why women want another man in their lives. The most common reason that they give for their infidelity is that they are hurt emotionally. This hurt can come from the emotional rejection by their partner, because they are lonely, or because they found out that their partner cheated and now they want to exact revenge. Sometimes it is because they just want to make sure they are still attractive to other men because they have low self-esteem or self-confidence.

Loneliness is the main reason women give for cheating on their husband or boyfriend. They are left alone a lot while their spouse goes out with the boys or takes a lot of trips associated with work. This makes for an unsatisfactory relationship in which their emotional needs are not being met. They therefore look to another man to give them what they miss from their relationship. Even if they know the partner is working long hours to make money that they need, she still fells as if work is taking precedence over her needs.

When a woman feels lonely in a relationship and her emotional needs are mot being met, she feels as if she is unattractive and that her partner doesn’t love her. Instead of talking about her feelings with her partner, she feels it is easier to seek what she needs from another source. While most of the time this is another man, it could also be from another woman in a lesbian relationship.

A woman that has been hurt by her partner wants revenge. There is nothing as dangerous as a woman scorned. She will do whatever it takes to get back at her partner and prove that two can play at this game. Sometimes, she has not actually discovered that her partner has been unfaithful, but she does have her suspicions. The only way she can think of to draw him out into the open is to have an affair herself, hoping that it will make him wake up and start to work on saving their relationship. In this case, she is not cheating out of revenge, but is doing so as a cry for help.

The thrill and excitement of sneaking around is often a turn on for some women and this is why they cheat. They want to see how long they can carry on with an affair before getting caught and like the attention they receive from both their partner and their lover. For some, the experience of cheating is something that gives them an adrenalin rush. They are bored with their life as a wife and mother and want to be appreciated in other ways.

Whatever the reasons women or men give for cheating on their partners, the result is that both of them get hurt when the affair comes out in the open. This is especially tragic when there are children involved who inadvertently get hurt and they don’t understand why.

10 Signs of Cheating Spouses - What To Look For

Wednesday, July 16th, 2008

Do you suspect that your spouse is cheating on you? Do you know the warning signs? There is no one sign, short of catching your spouse in bed with another partner, which will point to the cheating. Rather it is a combination of signs that will give you the evidence you need to make an outright accusation. The top ten signs of a cheating spouse may be summarized as follows:

1. When you spouse comes home from work each day, the normal routine was to share what you each did during the day. Now that seems to have changed and he/she no longer wants to tell you things that happened at the office or give you details of how the day went. When you try to press the issue and ask questions, your spouse may become very irritated and want to change the subject.

2. You start to notice changes in your spouse’s work schedule. Where you once went to work and cam home at the same time, your spouse’s day starts and ends at a different time than yours. There may be more evening meetings than usual or more travel involved than there ever was before. Maybe overtime is the excuse, but you notice that there is no extra pay on the check for these extra hours.

3. All of a sudden, your spouse may take an interest in a new hobby or sport that takes him/her out of the house more often. This could include such things as joining a gym, taking up golfing or something else in which he previously displayed no interest at all.

4. New clothes, hairstyles and hair color seem to be his/her main priority. This is especially true for a spouse that despised shopping but now takes advantage of every opportunity to go shopping. Purchases of more stylish clothing and dressing up to go out for a walk are signs you should be aware of.

5. Showering immediately after coming home could mean that he/she doesn’t have the scent of perfume or aftershave that is different from yours. This is especially true if your spouse has only recently started doing this and normally would not bother to shower until bedtime or in the morning.

6. Another sign you should be aware of is when your spouse suddenly changes the scent of perfume or aftershave. This could mean that your spouse has received a gift or new perfume or aftershave from the “other person”.

7. When talking on the cell phone, your spouse usually carried on all conversations in your presence. You became used to the cell phone ringing on all occasions. Now your spouse leaves the room when the cell phone rings and usually the phone is turned off when you are around.

8. A casual conversation with your spouse about cheating causes him/her visible discomfort. This is a warning sign that something is going on that your spouse doesn’t want you to find out about.

9. The least little thing you do cause your spouse to become argumentative and critical, whereas in the past, he/she was very easy going. You get the idea that your spouse is annoyed that you are around and wants to be somewhere else.

10. Is the position of the seat in the car always moved and you have to move it back to your position of comfort? When you ask how come this is happening all the time, you either get no response or one that just doesn’t make sense.

Know the Signs of a Cheating Boyfriend

Wednesday, July 9th, 2008

How would you know that your boyfriend is cheating on you? Although you may not have hard evidence, you do have a feeling that things have changed. There are signs of a cheating boyfriend that you can look for without having to go to the extreme of hiring a private detective to collect evidence for you. The main thing is to pay attention to details - the little things that you would often overlook - and most off trust your instincts that something is not quite right with the relationship.

The first thing you may notice and this is probably what caused you to become suspicious, is a decided lack of intimacy. Your boyfriend may shy away from touching or make excuses of why you cannot go out together. You may notice that he doesn’t have the same enthusiasm for activities that you both once enjoyed. If you do not live together, you may find it harder to reach him on the phone and he may have unusual explanations of why he couldn’t answer your calls.

Check to see if your boyfriend has a history of cheating on his girlfriends. You may have been one of those women with whom he cheated while he was dating someone else. If so, you can probably tell the exact times when things started to change between you. If you do know some of his ex-girlfriends, you can casually start a conversation about how their relationship ended without arousing their suspicions that your relationship may be in jeopardy.

Unwarranted or constant criticism of things you say or do or the clothes you wear is another hint that the relationship is changing. This is because he could be comparing you to his new girlfriend and is waiting for you to get angry so he can have an excuse to end it all. You should not react with anger, but rather take this as an opportunity to sit and talk about what you perceive to be problems. He may not even realize that he is criticizing you or you may just be taking exception to what he says because you do have suspicions of cheating.

Another extreme of behavior could be that your boyfriend is acting more loving than usual and bringing you gifts, which he has never done in the past. While you do like to receive gifts, if you do have suspicions that he is cheating, you should start to question why all the gifts all of a sudden without insulting him.

You do have to give your boyfriend lost of rope to hang himself with so that you can catch him in a lie or in the act of being with another woman. This means you should take things slowly at first and not jump to conclusions too quickly. He will be careful at first, but if he thinks you are not noticing any differences, then he will get lax and start to make mistakes. The you can move in quickly and confront him with the evidence.