How To End An Emotional Affair Once And For All
Whether or not your affair has been discovered, when you want to end it you will likely look for advice about how to end an emotional affair. The affair probably started out accidentally and you never intended it to go this far. This is especially hard to do if the person with whom you are cheating on your partner is someone in your office that you see on a daily basis. The affair may have developed in a sort of permanent situation, so now you feel trapped and caught between a relationship that you want to continue with your spouse and one that gives you a feeling of excitement.
The first thing you have to do to end an emotional affair is to break it off. This may be hurtful for your lover, especially if he/she didn’t know that you were married or in a relationship. This step is important if you don’t want to continue with the betrayal because of your feelings of guilt. You have to tell your lover that your partner is too important to you to continue with the affair and run the risk of breaking up the marriage. If you communicate through email, block the messages from coming through. Don’t answer any calls on your cell phone or home phone.
You do have to take steps at work to distance yourself from your coworker. Make sure that you don’t take lunch together or make sure that there is always someone else with you whenever you have conversations. If you usually hang out with the gang from the office after work for a few drinks, you will have to make changes in your lifestyle and discontinue doing this is if the “other” person is part of this group. Try to limit communication in the office in emails or professional ways. Ending the relationship means that you won’t be able to continue a friendship with this person, as this will send them mixed signals.
The next step in completely ending an emotional affair is to admit the affair to your partner. This is often harder than breaking it off. It is important to admit to the affair before your partner finds out on his/her own. This is a way of saying that you really are sorry and that your relationship is the most important thing in your life. It hurts a lot more when the admission doesn’t come freely from you.
When you end an affair, you will have a feeling of relief that there are no more secrets and that everything is finally out in the open. However, you do have to take responsibility for your actions. No matter what problems you may be having in your marriage, you should never place the blame for the affair on your partner. Your partner is likely feeling that he/she did something wrong or didn’t meet your needs so not taking the blame will only make the situation worse. You also shouldn’t expect things to go back to normal right away. Your partner will need space to get over this and forgive you.